Trying to get girlfriend pregnant
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First, when we first began having sex I was reluctant. I'm not a virgin, but I feel like the less you do it the better are the chances that your girlfriend won't get pregnant.
Also, other activities can be just as fun in my opinion. She was visibly mad about this and said she really liked intercourse. However, it's not just intercourse she likes, she wants to "orgasm with me at the same time". I think this might have been code for "I want you to ejaculate inside me even if you have a condom". Yes, I wore a condom, but I still feel better not finishing inside her. Next, when we had an unrelated argument I said something along the lines of "I'd do anything for you".
After the argument she got on me and said "you'd do anything for me? Well I want a baby". I got quiet and felt cold. She knew I was scared and after about minutes she laughed it off as a joke. My mind was racing about the possibility it wasn't a joke. Finally, she started eating odd foods, things that someone pregnant might eat. She joked that she could be pregnant, then joked again that she's pregnant only if she could get pregnant from my finger.
She said that if she did gets pregnant with my child, she'd keep it because I'm such a good guy. My thoughts are that if she gets pregnant, I would deal with the situation responsibly, but I really don't want a baby right now.
I think she either actively wants a baby or just thinks that if it happens it happens. My question is how can I ask her if she actually wants a baby, while having the best chance of getting an honest answer? I've been on the "baby crazy" train before, and your situation is nowhere near that. To be fair, I can't conclusively disprove anything, since any observation maybe be wrong and could just be an even better kept secret.
However, I do think that you have some hangups about babies yourself, which is impacting your observations. I'll address both you and her separately, because I think this is more a matter of two people with different outlooks, rather than you having a secretly baby crazy girlfriend who's trying to entrap you.
This is not an attack on you. It's an honest observation of what you've told us, because I want to highlight that any hangups from your side are going to skew your perception of what's normal, and therefore how your girlfriend's behavior is not normal. You don't mention any suspicious behavior on her part; but you were already considering limiting sex to avoid possible pregnancies.
Without any mention of suspicious behavior on your part, I can only assume this thought originated from you, not from her. You're equating two very different things. While, yes, male orgasms involve ejaculation, and yes, she's presumably asking you to have an orgasm while inside her; she's not asking you to impregnate her.
Secondly, "this might have been code for" is something that sounds like you're reaching for ulterior motives. Not only are you suggesting it means something else "code" , you're not even sure that it did "might". This phrasing is often used to inject spurious claims into an separate conversation "Maybe John did some drugs as a teenager, I don't know".
I'm not accusing you of intentionally doing it, but it does seem like you're actively looking for hidden meanings. I'm going to approach this very carefully. Yes, no contraceptive is failsafe. Yes, you're of course allowed to be apprehensive of pregnancy when you're not ready for it. But your assumption that protected sex will lead to pregnany is blowing it out of proportion. You are very close to essentially wanting to abstain from penetrative sex until you're ready to try for children. If you are that apprehensive of pregnancies that you wish to limit sexual encounters and would rather pull out from unprotected sex or focus on "other activities" instead of penetrative sex; I do wonder why you're having sex?
After all, if you take such an apprehensive stance, wouldn't it then logically follow that you should also heed the warning that you can get pregant from having sex once? Don't get me wrong, I'm not shaming you or telling you you're wrong. Your opinion and feelings matter. But I'm trying to get you to see that you are more-than-averagely apprehensive of pregnancies to a point of detracting from a non-baby-oriented sex life. And that's okay.
This again sounds like you're trying to justify a pre-existing assumption that she is or wants to be pregnant. Most people have some sort of "crazy" food combination that they really like even though it sounds or even tastes horrible to others. That is nothing unusual. On top of that, you describe her as an immigrant. If she's from a different culture, it's massively more likely that you and her have some differing culinary preferences. You're both right.
I'm not correcting either of you here. What I do find interesting, is your addition of the "finger quotes". You're suggesting to the reader that she said something suspicious or at least remarkably inaccurate. You're both correct, but I think you interpreted her reply differently from what she intended to convey. I think you heard this:. I agree with your girflfriends assertion that they are pretty much safe.
That is to say, the margins of failure are incredibly small but indeed not non-existant and your apprehension of having sex when using a condom seems disproportionate to the actual risk factor. Sure and I'll address her side it maybe not being a joke in a moment.
However, I just want to stress that any joke could be interpreted as being a "secret truth". You could say that about literally anything. I'm not saying your interpretation is wrong or right. I'm just trying to stress that "it's possible she wasn't joking" is not actual proof of her secretly wanting a baby. It would only be proof if you conclusively know that she wasn't joking. However, as you are the one telling the story and you were feeling uncomfortable, it's not impossible that is was a much shorter time but it felt much longer to you.
I can't know, and neither can you. Only she can answer that question. But if you're already at the stage of suspecting that she's lying to you or secretly trying to get you to impregnate her, you're liable to dismiss any explanation of hers as a willful lie. This may be subconscious on your part. This is a joke just like the other one, but there's an interesting facet here: the joke centers itself around you mostly having non-penetrative sex "your finger".
We again run into a list of possibilities:. The latter options are of course very extreme cases and by no means likely! I only mentioned them because I want to showcase how widely varied your interpretation of her statement can be, even if she only intended it as a harmless joke and maybe unintentionally crossed a line about what you find funny. As the other answers have suggested, the pregnancy jokes may be a step too far from her side. However, I'm not ready to conclude that her bad joke is an indication of secret plans; as opposed to simply being a bad joke.
One of the issues here is that your apprehension of pregnancy may actually be triggering her to joke about it innocently or not; I don't want to get into the varied psychological reasons for this.
This becomes a feedback loop: Your apprehension leads to her jokes, which leads to more apprehension from you, which leads to her joking about that, and so on You also haven't mention much about your girlfriend other than the things that worry you.
This makes it hard to see whether this is a predominant behavior of hers or whether you've subconsciously cherrypicked a few rare occasions where her phrasing left something open for interpretation. Is she perhaps prone to joking all the time, or are these the only jokes she makes? Does she tend to push boundaries comedic or otherwise or not? Does she have a pushy nature to get you to do what she wants or not?
All of these character traits can have a vast impact on how you should interpret her alleged joke attempts, and this information is understandably missing from the problem description. I want to summarize here, both in observations and how I suggest you approach the issue with her. These are roughly ordered by importance. I'm apprehensive of adding a few phrasings here, because these are very sensitive topics and it's very important that you represent your own genuine feelings.
If you want to, there is nothing wrong with taking the time to write down your thoughts and reading from the piece of paper during your open discussion. If you need this to clearly communicate your side, then that is of course allowed. The most important part is that the words are genuinely yours, regardless of how long you took to compose them.
It sounds like you and your girlfriend ought to sit down and discuss what the future of your relationship is. From what you've said, it sounds like she is interested in having a baby, and you are at least not interested right now, and you need to determine how you as a couple want to handle that.
I feel the need to point out that it's entirely possible she brings these things up in order to have a discussion about your future, and not because she absolutely wants a baby right now. It could be that she just wants to be sure that's a direction your relationship is headed in; you won't know unless you communicate with each other. People often don't like to have these kinds of discussions because if you find out that what you want is drastically different, then it often leads to the end of the relationship; IMO, you will be happier in a relationship with similar goals and honest discussion of priorities, and both you and your partner will be happier if you don't invest years in each other when it's very unlikely that what you want will ever converge.
I'd like to discuss our future and what we both want out of this relationship. Can we spend a little bit of time thinking about our future and have that discussion soon?
Sex positions for getting pregnant
SOME women will do just about anything to have a baby, including skipping their birth control without telling their partners it seems. While some couples want to wait for financial stability or the right time, some women are willing to steam roll ahead regardless of who is on board. Some women have taken to Whisper , a site that allows people to confess things anonymously, to talk about the secretive ways they are trying to have a baby.
If you're struggling to get pregnant, here are 10 reasons you may be having trouble. It might seem that getting pregnant is straightforward process, but having a baby depends on everything being just right, including your lifestyle. Sex waxes and wanes over the course of a relationship, but having a frank discussion with your partner about the end goal could set things in motion. If either of you have more than four units a week it can lower your chances of falling pregnant by a third. You may want to try cutting down gradually or take part in intiatives such as Dry January to give you a kickstart.
My wife and I are trying to get pregnant. How do I improve my sperm health?
Many men are concerned that their partner is pregnant. This is a fairly common feeling and one that often plays out in bedrooms and bathrooms all over the world. You can get a home pregnancy test at nearly any local grocery store, drug store, or big box store. You can even order pregnancy tests online from a variety of sources. It is impossible to really know if a woman is pregnant unless she takes a pregnancy test. This is most commonly done with a home pregnancy test that uses urine. The test looks for the hormone human chorionic gonadotropin hCG in the urine, which is produced in pregnancy. To ensure that the test is the most accurate it can be, you will want to ensure that you follow all of the instructions written on the pregnancy test. A word of caution about early pregnancy tests that say that they can be used prior to her missed period - they are only as accurate as the hCG available. This means a positive is possible, but a negative could still be positive in the days to come.
Why can’t I get pregnant?
That said, if you and your girl have been trying for a while without success, these five crazy factors could explain your inability to conceive:. That means guys hoping to have kids should knock off their usual masturbation habits in the week leading up to their attempts at conception, Dr. Your Junk Might Be Faulty Roughly one out of every men suffers from some form of hypospadias—or a misplaced urethra opening, Dr. Guys with hypospadias may have to consider artificial insemination methods, Dr.
For the best chance of getting pregnant, you need to get your eggs and your partner's sperm together as often as possible. More than 8 out of 10 couples where the woman is aged under 40 will get pregnant within one year if they have regular unprotected sex. More than 9 out of 10 couples will get pregnant within two years. Having vaginal sex every 2 to 3 days will give you the best chance of getting pregnant.
Is My Girlfriend Pregnant?
The subject who is truly loyal to the Chief Magistrate will neither advise nor submit to arbitrary measures. This article was published more than 6 years ago. Some information in it may no longer be current.
If your girlfriend becomes unexpectedly pregnant, it affects both of you. Cycle length varies from woman to woman and can range from 21 to 35 days with the average being 28 days. There are four phases to her cycle: menstruation, the follicular phase, ovulation, and the luteal phase. That creates a situation where her egg and your sperm are in the same place at the same time, and she could potentially get pregnant. That means there is about a six-day window each month around ovulation that your girlfriend is more likely to get pregnant if you have unprotected sex. Excellent question.
How to get pregnant
Have you been popping those little white pills since high school? Take a pass on your prescription a few months before you plan to start trying , says Christopher Williams, M. That goes for other forms of hormonal birth control too.
Women reveal the reasons they’re secretly trying to get pregnant
If you and your partner want to get pregnant , you might be wondering what you can do to help. While most methods of improving fertility tend to focus on tracking a woman's cycle, as a man, you can take steps that may improve your sperm count. There's no way to guarantee that you and your partner will conceive, but there are things you can do to increase the odds! Tip: In addition to cutting out unhealthy snacks like chips and sweets, especially avoid processed meats like bacon.
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